How to Ease Your Child's Test Anxiety in Elementary School

If your elementary-schooler has ever had a tummy ache the night before a test or burst into tears at the mention of upcoming state standardized testing, you’re not alone. Test anxiety is a common challenge for young students, and as a parent, it can be hard to know how to help.

While a little bit of those nervous feelings can actually motivate kids to do their best, too much worry can make it hard for your little learner to concentrate, recall and recognize what they know, and feel confident in their abilities. The good news? There are evidence-based strategies that you can use to help your child feel more confident and in control—and less overwhelmed—when test day rolls around.

In this article, we’ll explore practical, research-informed tips for supporting your child through test anxiety and boosting their confidence.

Talk With Your Child About Their Test Anxiety 

Helping your child overcome their test anxiety starts with talking about it. Begin by learning more about how they are feeling. Ask open-ended questions to gather more information about what is on their mind. Questions like, “What feels scary about taking the test?” or “What part of the test are you most worried about?” can help give you important details about your child’s test-taking fears. You may even learn that there is misunderstanding about the test that is driving their anxiety that you can address right away.

If your child is struggling to share how they are feeling with you, take a step back and help them connect with the physical experience of their worry with questions like “What does your worry feel like in your body?” or “Where in your body are you feeling anxious?” or ask them to draw a picture of their worry.

Encourage your child to talk about and name their fears. This helps shrink the size of those feelings. Research shows that labeling emotions can have a calming effect on the brain. 

Tip: Stay calm and supportive as you talk. Children often mirror our emotional state—your steady presence helps them feel secure.

Build a Test Anxiety Toolkit

Help your child build their own test anxiety toolkit by teaching them portable strategies to help bust their worries in the moment and build confidence. 

Support them in harnessing the power of their breath by introducing deep breathing skills. Taking slow, deep breaths helps to activate the body’s relaxation response, which slows down the heart rate and helps shrink big feelings, including test anxiety. Focusing on their breath can help bring your child back into the present moment and focus on the task at hand.

Help your child quiet their inner critic by helping them be their own cheerleader. Start by asking them what they would say to their best friend if they learned that they were feeling worried about the test. This is likely advice that they can use themselves! Encourage them to practice this pep talk so that they can use it on test day.

Tip: Try Starfish Breathing with your child using the downloadable guide below. This portable strategy can be discretely used on test day to support them in managing their worries.

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Make the Unknown Known

The unknown can be scary—especially when you're in elementary school. One way to reduce anxiety is by making the test feel familiar before your child ever sits down to take it.

Ask your child’s teacher if they can share a sample test or a description of what the test will look like. Then, go over these materials together in a relaxed, no-pressure setting. This kind of preview can help a child feel more confident and in control.

Tip: If your child is concerned about a standardized test and their teacher does not have a sample of what your child can expect, your state’s department of elementary education may have released test questions and practice tests on their website.

Help Prepare Little by Little

Cramming is stressful—even for adults. If your child is worried about a test they can prepare for, encourage them to break their studying into small, manageable chunks rather than a single epic study marathon.

This approach, known as “spaced repetition,” has been shown to significantly boost memory and retention. For example, if there’s a spelling test on Friday, aim to study just 5 or 10 minutes a day starting Monday.

Tip: Work backward from the test date to build a study schedule together. Post it somewhere visible so your child knows what to expect and provide a small reward, like a special study snack, to promote ongoing follow through. Remember to praise them for putting in the hard work preparing for test day!

Find Study Methods That Work

Not every child learns the same way. Some are visual learners, others thrive with hands-on activities.

Try different techniques to find what clicks—like flashcards, drawing pictures, or turning facts into songs. Research shows that tailoring study methods to a child’s learning style can significantly improve comprehension and reduce frustration.

Tip: Don’t be afraid to ask your child’s teacher what study strategies work best for your child in the classroom. They see them in a different environment and might offer insights you hadn’t considered.

Teach Basic Test-Taking Strategies

Sometimes, anxiety comes from not knowing how to take a test, rather than what’s on it. Basic test-taking strategies can go a long way toward calming nerves.

Encourage your child to try these skills that apply to most tests:

• Read all instructions carefully.
  
  
• Skip hard questions and come back to them later.
  
  
• Check over all answers before turning in the test.
  
  

Tip: Practice these strategies during homework time so they become second nature before the big day.

Boost Confidence with Praise 

Your child’s self-esteem plays a big role in how they experience stress. Celebrate the effort your child puts into preparing—not just the end result.

Praise specific behaviors like “Great job reviewing your homework and making that change to number 7” instead of saying “You’re so smart.” This builds what's called a "growth mindset," which helps kids view challenges as opportunities rather than threats.

Tip: Celebrate wins that have nothing to do with academics, too—whether it’s helping a sibling or being kind to a classmate. Confidence built in one area can spill over into others.

Remind Your Child of Available Support

If your child has an Individualized Education Program (IEP) or a Section 504 Plan, they likely qualify for accommodations for testing such as extended time to complete the test or testing in a quiet space to reduce distractions. These supports can dramatically reduce test-related stress.

Make sure your child knows what their accommodations are and remind them that it’s okay to use them. They are there to help support them in demonstrating all that they know!

Tip: Check in with your child’s teacher and/or school counselor to ensure that accommodations are carried out.

Help Your Child Feel Good on Test Day

Setting your child up for success on the day of the test starts with the basics: sleep, nutrition, and routine.

Aim for a full night’s rest (9–12 hours for elementary schoolers), a protein-rich breakfast like eggs, Greek yogurt, and/or nut butter on toast, and an unhurried, calm morning. Avoid last-minute, day-of cramming, which can heighten stress.

Tip: Reduce screen time the evening before the test to help your child wind down and get better rest.

Debrief After Tests

Once the test is over, resist the urge to ask, “How did you do?” Instead, ask, “How did it feel?”

Talking about the experience helps your child reflect, learn, and feel heard. Over time, this kind of post-test check-in can reduce anxiety and improve performance.

Tip: Discuss what went well, and where there’s room for growth—then use those insights to prepare smarter next time.

FAQ with Dr. Alison Stoner

How can I tell if my child’s test anxiety is serious?
If your child is frequently avoiding school or experiencing physical symptoms like stomachaches or headaches, it may be time to consult with a school counselor or a licensed mental health professional.

Should I talk to the teacher about my child’s anxiety?
Absolutely. Teachers can offer accommodations or changes in how tests are administered, and they appreciate being looped in to support your child.

What can I do if my child refuses to study?
Break up studying into smaller intervals and make it fun with games or mini-rewards. Creating a distraction-free, designated study area can also help.

Is it normal for my child to feel nervous before every test?
Some nervousness is normal, but if it’s persistent and overwhelming, your child may need extra support developing coping strategies.

How can I help my child manage school stress beyond test anxiety?
Create a balanced routine that includes time for play, relaxation, and downtime. Keep lines of communication open and encourage your child to share their feelings about school.

Helping your child work through test anxiety is about more than just acing the next exam. It’s about building lifelong skills like self-awareness, goal setting, and managing negative emotions that will serve them far beyond elementary school.

By identifying the sources of their stress, developing coping skills, preparing little by little, and boosting their confidence with consistent support, you can help your child feel empowered, not overwhelmed.

And remember, you don’t have to navigate this alone. If you’re concerned about your child’s mental health or need more guidance on managing school stress and anxiety, reach out to Little Otter for personalized support and expert advice.

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